A way to converse

There’s an interesting conversational style that seems to be growing in popularity in my office, and I thought it’d be a good idea to document it. It’s a quite clipped, brusque style, I find.

The first rule is to only initiate a conversation with a person if you believe they can do something for you or give you something. Make it clear that what you want, and that they have no option but to give it to you.

If at any point the conversation veers away from what it is that you want, use body language and facial expressions to communicate your distress. Cross your arms and make a face like you’ve just suddenly been fed a teaspoon of vinegar.

Quickly determine if the person you’re speaking to will, in fact, be useful to you. It it turns out they won’t, end the conversation immediately by simply saying, “Never mind,” and walking away.

This all sounds terribly rude. Well… it is. But! I can assure you that it is the style being adopted by some of the most successful people I’ve ever met. I mean, not that I’ve met them for long, but still!

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A way to converse

2 thoughts on “A way to converse

  1. amy says:

    Grotesque. But not surprising. Or at least, it seems to fit with the kind of thing I generally associate with the way people treat each other out there in the world, part of the reason I try not to leave the house. Thanks for reinforcing my appreciation of my books and my plants! Also, very sorry to hear it. It does sound like an increase in the degree of ick. People. Sigh.

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    1. I’m hoping the increase is only local — my company got bought by a much, much larger one, leading to an influx of people who feel they that they are Very Important in the office. I keep trying to get permission to work from home a couple of times a month, so I won’t have to look at their stupid faces so often.

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