So… what exactly are people supposed to do when the get to the end of their ropes? The reason I ask is that it seems like either this hardly ever happens. Or perhaps it happens a lot, but dealing with it is such common knowledge that nobody ever mentions it. I guess that maybe you’re supposed to talk about it with someone? Is that something normal people do? Who exactly are they talking to?
I have precisely one friend in this world, and I’m pretty sure that A) he can’t help me, and B) he’d stop calling me if I ever got to be too much of a downer. I can’t let him see me like this. What about my family? I can’t see that going well. I am the crutch that they lean on. I could tell them how miserable I am, but all that would do is worry them. “Oh my, how horrible for you — now, please listen to all of my problems, and also please keep feeding us money forever and ever.”
I have no one to talk about this stuff with but myself, and I am hardly a reliable person. But I am all I have left.
Maybe I should quit my job that I’m failing at, and that I hate?
“But what if you can’t get another one that pays as well? Who will pay the mortgage?”
Or… maybe I should take some time off to sort some things out?
“You get 40 hours off a year. You’d need to take an unpaid leave of absence. Who will pay the mortgage while you do that?”
Perhaps I should see a therapist?
“You get home from work at eight o’clock at night, and you have to get out of bed at four in the morning. When were you planning on going?”
“Also, wouldn’t a therapist either mostly be interested in billing your insurance for as long as possible, or trying to get you back to work as fast as they can? What’s in it for you, exactly?”
“Besides, in the end you either end up with another job that you hate because all jobs are lousy, or you end up with no job and lose everything, and get to experience a level of desperation and suffering that you’ve never even dreamed of.”
Well I guess I’ll just do nothing then.